lifestyle \\ the one-sided friendship

Thursday, 19 September 2013

We all have different groups of friends. I have ones that I can be outrageously crazy with, ones that I have serious life talks with, ones I know will come with me on my adventures and ones that I have known for years and have been through the most with me and are still around. Collectively, I couldn't be without them. 

When I form new friendships, my friendship is unconditional. There are no exams you have to pass, I don't have to reveal stuff about my past and make sure you're ok with it before we can officially put the stamp of 'friendship' onto it. A recent new friendship I have formed got me questioning...if someone asked what we knew about each other, I think I could answer pretty well but the other person would probably know zilch about me except from a pre-formed opinion of me. So now I think I'm stuck in this one-sided friendship in which I am giving out free life advice and getting nothing out of it but frustration.

Never one to shy away from a challenge or to give up too easily, I have been told to step away so that I don't get hurt in the long run but I know my walls are back up and it won't go that far. Should friendship ever stretch to the point where you have to put up your walls?

I'm definitely at that age now where I'm happy to meet new people and not to worry about anything because from what I have learnt, worrying won't get you anything but frown lines. But a friendship means more to me than me being there for the other person. Shouldn't they be there for me too and listen to me rant about the fact someone at work made me an awful cup of tea or the fact that I ate an amazing cheese and bacon burger the other day and I can't get over it? The feeling that I have to keep schtum and listen to the other person pour their heart and soul out to me makes me feel sad because I'm only ever an advice helpline to them. 

Perhaps I am jumping to conclusions to quickly and thinking too harshly on the other person but I'm not quite sure how far down the line I should wait until I should step away and think about myself for once.

Such an intense post from me! What are your thoughts? What would you do if you were in a one-sided friendship?



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